Devil's Gate Music
Related Articles
“I’m a rock and roll party cowboy/And I ain’t gonna read no Tolstoy/Coz I’m a rock and roll party cowboy/And I ain’t going to eat no Bok choy.”
Enter the well-worn phrase, “The Darkness are back” right about now. Except that’s not exactly true because Suffolk’s most famous sons have been back and shitting out solid gold ever since reuniting in 2011. And album number eight, ‘Dreams on Toast’, is shitting out so much solid gold that Village Idiot-in-Chief D****d T***p is feverishly checking on the gold reserves at Fort Knox because “…maybe somebody stole the gold. Tons of gold.”
Witty, with a wicked sense of humour, and that’s just the all-guns-blazing opening track, ‘Rock And Roll Party Cowboy ‘. A tongue-in-cheek piss-take of the stereotypical hair-metal “bad boys” of the 80’s (or any decade for that matter) that asks “Hey, where the ladies at?”. With so many cliched trademarks, we’ll all recognise someone that we’ve crossed paths with over the years. “Leather jacket, no sleeves/Harley-Davidson, yes, please/Zippo lighter, Marlboro Reds/Jack Daniels (big party)” all standard issue during the, ahem, glory years of The Sunset Strip, and imitated at Rock clubs the length and breadth of these shores. In the hands of The Darkness, it’s a deliciously wry slice of observational humour fuelled by a rock-solid beat from Rufus Tiger Taylor that ends with Justin Hawkins bellowing “Fuck off”. Not sure who at. It could be at the protagonists of the song, or it could be the protagonists of the song finally snapping after one jibe too many.
The listener will find this sort of humour peppered throughout ‘Dreams on Toast’. ‘Cold Hearted Woman’, for instance, is one of those moments that stops the listener in their tracks and forces a few rewinds to check if their hearing is intact. Played out with a jaunty country-jamboree pace, it’s great fun and very Queen-like in places. ”39′ with cowboy boots, dungarees, and bawdy seaside postcard rhyming (well almost, because Justin Hawkins doesn’t quite go where you expect him to as that would stray into Steel Panther territory).
Every album needs a song about the perils of farting in front of your loved one, and ‘Hot On My Tail’ is The Darkness’s take on the quandry that many are faced with daily. Imagine Queen’s ‘Seaside Rendevouz’ with a honky-tonk country feel, and you are almost there. And then remember the look of relief on Joel McHale’s face in the Ted movie when he can finally let rip after holding one in for so long. And ask yourself what camp you are in. Camp Hawkins, or Camp McHale?
‘Walking Through Fire’ also has a few Queen-isms, thanks mainly to the melodious Brian May-like guitar licks that pop up here and there. Full-on self-deprecation from Hawkins on this uptempo earworm that is oven-ready for audience participation. Full of sharp lyrics: “Next long player/Ooh, it’s coming out soon/I’ll be honest/I’m under the moon/We’re only doing this ’cause it’s fun/Don’t even think my mum bought the last one”, it is a joyful moment that unfolds into an infectious love letter to rock ‘n’ roll.
It’s not all double entendres and fart gags though; there are plenty of explosive riffage on show, and the hooks throughout the 10 featured tracks are bloody massive. If boogie-filled riffs and gorgeous backing vocal harmonies are your bag, then strap on ‘Mortal Dread’ (with Axl Rose touches from Justin Hawkins here and there) and ‘I Hate Myself’ on for size. And who but Justin Hawkins could have pulled off that one-take unedited video for ‘I Hate Myself’? (“I can’t wait for everybody to see it – it means a lot to me… and I’m here for the conversation. I love you all. I just hate myself.”)
As eclectic (and as eccentric) as ever (similar to ‘Hot On My Tail’, ‘The Longest Kiss’ also echoes Queen’s ‘Seaside Rendevouz’, and is immediately followed-on by a Beastie Boys-like intro on ‘The Battle For Gadget Land’, and then there is the small matter of the majestical, sweeping closing track ‘Weekend In Rome’ which simply dazzles), The Darkness are – once again – shitting out solid gold. And judging by the clamour for tickets for the current UK tour, plenty of people are happy that they are. Hello, Wembley!
‘Dreams on Toast’ is available March 28th via Cooking Vinyl. Pre-order HERE.
Review – Dave
Portrait photo credits – Simon Emmett
Live image – Callum Scott
THE DARKNESS 2025 UK HEADLINE TOUR DATES
27/03 – Leicester, De Montford Hall (SOLD OUT)
28/03 – Cambridge, Corn Exchange (SOLD OUT)
29/03 – London, OVO Arena Wembley (SOLD OUT)
31/03 – Manchester, O2 Apollo (SOLD OUT) *
01/04 – Newcastle, O2 City Hall (SOLD OUT) *
*rescheduled date
